With new smokers I notice one common practice that's certain to provide immediate tongue bite issues, they blaze up and puff away like a steamship, trying to get a lot of smoke and flavor. A big burning cherry blazing up from the bowl, thick plumes of smoke blown. This is not how it's done. No variety of tobacco will allow for this without producing ill results. If you pack the bowl so it is a little looser below and a little tighter (a little, not a lot) on top, then patiently light it, let it go out, and repeat a couple of times, you can slowly sip away at it and get nice subtle flavors that will not maim your tongue. Also, starting with a smaller bowl and trying to caress the smoke along will produce better results than a wide deep bowl that will tend towards a bigger fire inside. The idea is a small, just barely maintained smolder. I'd reccomend you carve yourself a little group 3 prince shape and break it in with a nice mild burley, like Uhle's 00, Peretti's Thanksgiving Day, or the like. I'd stay away from aromatics as they tend to bite and actually have less flavor, inducing heavier puffing in search of more flavor. Virginias can bite the novice as well. A simple, mild, American burley is the way to go, IMHO.
For me, tobacco and wine do not mix well. Coffee is best, tea is good too. If you want to enjoy a glass of something nice with your husband away from your pipe, try a nice ruby port 8)